Impossibly Positive

Friday, February 29, 2008

When is it time for a toddler bed?

I'm moving in May, and I would love to have Rev out of her crib by then. I've already had to dismantle and reassemble it three times, and this last time, the rail won't even lower anymore. At the same time, despite a recent raise, I'm cheap as hell, and want to keep the purchase under $100. I looked all over the web tonight, and came up with a few ideas.

Seriously, I never thought I'd be a Walmart shopper, and I've only actually ever been inside one of their stores once, but they had the best deals going. I'll have to order online and wait, but I'm all about instant gratification. My tax refund check was quite nice this year, and a bed for her is a necessary expense, so Ikea may be my destination tomorrow. I've never been there, either! We only just got one this past summer. Hopefully Rev's awful cold will be not quite so gross tomorrow. It looked like a slug was crawling out of her nose this evening. Eew!

Other big purchases on my list are a bed for ME since I'm sleeping on a twin since I left Nos, and a nice TV. I'm currently using one that I bought from a friend at work for $25. The nice one I bought with Nos I'm still paying off, even though he has it. Go figure. Same for some of our furniture, sigh...

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Thursday, February 28, 2008

Mom's Worst Nightmare

This past Monday through Thursday, Nos was at. my. house. Since he moved to Bend, he'd only seen Rev once in January. He took her Thursday night, and was staying with a local friend down here. I loved that idea, since with the weather we'd been having, I had nightmares of her being stuck on the other side of the pass, and me having to drive over four hours in my 4WD (which I don't know how to drive in snow) to get her. I guess this "friend" he'd been staying with ended up having romantic ideas, so Sunday night, at around 12:30am he bundled my daughter into his car, left the house (and one of Rev's shoes, GRR) and called me.

Finally, when I answered, I let him in, we played with Rev for a while, and went to bed - him on the floor with her in her room, because he insisted, even though she has a perfectly good crib. The picture I'm attaching is sad. I can't even let her wear those pajamas any more, because I can't bear it. She was wearing those the next morning...

Now please understand, I ALWAYS lock my door. Rev is going to be two in May, but she's tall, and my door handles are LOW. I think they're only about 2.5 feet off the ground, because I'm 5'2" and they're not even to my waist. Anyway, on that particular morning, he was going to stay home with her for an extra bonus day, and I went to work as usual.

I'm sure by now you can see where this is going.

I left my key on the mantle, kicked him awake, told him where it was, and left. With the door unlocked, because I didn't have the key. When I called at about 9:30, he reported she wasn't awake yet. Sometime between then and 10:30, they were both up, he fell back to sleep on the couch, and then she opened the front door, went down the stairs, and out into my apartment complex.

Let me pause for a moment to show you just how far it is from the couch to the door. Mind you, this is on a darn cell phone, so there's no fancy panoramic view in effect here. And also, he and I have talked about the fact that she can open the door. I'm almost tempted to demand that my apartment puts in knobs instead of handles, because there's no easy baby-proofing solution to the handles.

He didn't wake up until after a good samaritan had collected her off the road and returned her to my apartment office. It was a patrol car looping around the community doing that "whoop, whoop" siren noise that finally woke him up. In his defense, he's horrified. I can't imagine being the one to wake up with the door wide open and the knowledge that my child was gone. He still can't sleep at night. I got the call from him after Rev had been recovered at the office.

Need more horror? Check out the stairs. I don't even let her out of my arms when I'm with her outside the door because I'm terrified she'll fall down them.

DHS stopped by my house yesterday. How humiliating. I am a really good mom. Really. I left Nos to be in a better place with her, and she and I do just fine. He's in a much better place too. I leave for my first vacation since I found out I was pregnant this coming Wednesday, and he' scoming here to stay with Rev again. He's going to put my coffee table in front of the door, no kidding around. He's more scared than I am. Anyway, the very nice-seeming gal from DHS is going to stop by Thursday afternoon and interview him and her, and I'll make arrangements to have her stop by the following week. Since she only works during normal business hours, I'll have to grab Rev from daycare and bring her here for a couple of hours so she can see both of us.
Please understand that I know this is a huge, huge, deal. I'm a bit detached from it since I'm not the one who experinced the absolute visceral horror that Nos must have felt, but it still affects me greatly.

Thank God I move in two months. I'm ready.

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Monday, February 04, 2008

Hello stranger!

Well, oh well, oh well... what a busy season we've had?
Gosh, has it REALLY been three months? Jeez, so much for blogging in November. Or December. Or January. Ahem. Whoops!
Let's collect ourselves...
At the same job?
Child still living, breathing, and as cute as ever?
Paperwork filed to officially divorce my husband?
er... no... reasons to follow.
Ex-husband still taking daughter once a week?
er... no... again, reasons to follow.
Ex-husband still employed?
Ex-husband still living nearby?
Oh, jeez, look what happened? Since I last posted, did my ex have kidney failure (probably from drinking paint solvent because he had an open can at his work station), get fired, and move to Bend, OR?
Why, yes!
Cuz now it's totally ok for me to file final divorce proceedings, ha ha ha.
Can you see how much easier my life is?
You know, I totally had this single mom thing easy. Honestly, I got one or two nights off a week. That's a lot, since I've suddenly gone cold turkey for the last month. I can't really sell him short. He HAS wanted to see her recently, but the weather (and his flashy glamour car - WHICH IS ATTACHED TO MY!!! BANK ACCOUNT) won't let him go anywhere.
He's also behind on the "child support" OK... I ask for $800/mo. BUT WAIT. $500 of that is the car payment attached to MY bank account... which means when he is late, it comes out anyway. That's totally awesome for my stress levels, by the way. Let's just say he's been late about 40% of the time. The other $300.... 1/2 her daycare, 1/2 her health insurance, and his freakin' cell phone, which he also can't pay. So yeah, let's just say I'm not asking for much.
So that's it.
Oh, and my daughter actually had pigtails today after daycare. Which rocks. I heart her pigtails. They were so cute!
I stole her rubber bands and I'm wearing them now, ha ha!

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